Divorce is all about splitting things up. The couple splits and then they divide everything down the middle… assets, debts, home furnishings – the list goes on and on. But what happens to the friends? I don’t mean the friends that distinctly “belong” to one person or the other, but those who are friends of the couple. It’s like a multiple choice quiz:
a) Do you barter for the friends… “I’ll give you A and B if I can have C and D?”
b) Do you each plead your case (i.e. “He committed adultery, I did not.”) and then force the friends to choose between the two of you?
c) Does everyone stay friends and then in doing so the two of you agree to “alternating weekends” with said friends?
d) By divorcing have you each forfeited any and all relationships with the above mentioned friends?
So what’s the answer?
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Much as it might hurt your feelings to think so, your friends will be the ones to decide who gets who. Some will automatically ditch Scott because of what they know about your situation and they will rush to judgement .... that's human nature, but most won't want to be put in a position to "choose". From my personal experience, most will skirt the issue and social contact that could prove uncomfortable for them or you, and the dynamic of the relationship with them will change...it has to just like pretty much everything else in your life. You didn't ask for it to change, I know, but that doesn't have to be so bad. Give yourself and your friends time to adjust and accept. It's a real tuffy!!
ReplyDeleteI agree... they will be the ones who will decide.
ReplyDeleteSome will probably try to remain friends with you both...which is okay-- I jut wouldn't be talking with them about the "other one". You have to make yourself continue to look like the good person!