I had dream about her again the other night. I went down to the town that she lives (and works with my husband) in to meet her so we could talk. I asked her how everything with my husband got started… Who perused who; how it transformed from a random fling into an affair; and what he had told her about me and our marriage. I never actually HEARD her answers, but after we talked I felt a lot better.
To an extent this random dream inspired me. I am sitting here contemplating writing her a letter and asking of her the questions which my husband refuses to answer. Who knows, maybe one of these days I actually will.
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yikes, dunno about that
ReplyDeleteIt seems that you're spending more time focusing on what *he's* doing and when and why; and less time focusing on you and where you're headed. Could that be a way to avoid the reality of your situation? Are you getting counseling? I think that could be very helpful for you.
ReplyDeleteBeen there and done that..interesting conversation I will have to say. Did the letter too. Considering she was only 19/20 at the time I also sent a copy to her parents. Sue me I was one pissed off wife and mother! Can you blame me? Results of that were interesting too. Even if all you do is write it and then burn it it will still help. I wrote my letter 6 months before I mailed it. But I mailed it when I thought we were divorcing. Whatever you do I am still praying for you.
ReplyDeleteHugs!
Thank you, Courtney! It goes to show that NO ONE can judge until the have been there. Thank you for understanding where I am coming from and realizing that my actions are part of my journey forward and that I am doing ANYTHING BUT avoiding the reality of the situation!
ReplyDeleteHow have you been? I need to head over your way and read what's been going on. I'm also still praying for you each and every day!
Hugs to you too!!!